Watching films like Lost Horizon with its distinctly “capitalism sucks” message reminds me that those concerned citizens who agonize over all the sex and violence the liberal media are intent on selling our children are completely missing the point. Sex and violence after all, made this country what it is today – great! Read More

We’ve all admired director Edward G. Ulmer’s ability to make decent little movies like Detour and The Man From Planet X with nothing beyond a camera and a few actors. He had an uncanny ability to elicit an atmosphere and a look with these movies that belie their abbreviated shooting time and their even more abbreviated budget, so I was intrigued to see how his Journey Beneath the Desert would turn out. Could Ulmer finally be the guy to deliver on the promise of all those “lost races under the earth ruled by sexy broads” movies that inevitably disappointed? Read More

Uh, so where the magic beans? If I’m watching a movie called Jack the Giant Killer, then I have to believe that somewhere along the way, I’m going to see a dude named Jack get hoodwinked into trading grandma’s cow for some magic beans. Read More

Fee, fi, fo, fum! I smell the stench of another shabby Barry Mahon kiddie picture! This is the other movie on the DVD from Something Weird that features The Wonderful Land Of Oz, a movie that looks positively big budget compared to this one. Read More

Reg Park is one of our beefiest Hercules, with pecs the size of a regular guy’s head and his acting consists of standing around talking in a dubbed monotone, while periodically swinging giant paper-mâché stones over his head to accomplish whatever fantastic task this fun and colorful film demands of him. British horror legend Christopher Lee, who obviously lost some kind of bar bet, also shows up as the evil King Lico. Read More

If you’re watching Alan Steele (Zorro Contro Maciste) in this movie and wondering just where it was that he learned how to pose and wear his leather gauntlets with so much authenticity, it’s because he apprenticed under the very best in the beefcake business. Read More

Child of the most unholy union of them all, its father being Chuck Norris 1980s action studio the Cannon Group, its mother being Italian director Luigi Cozzi, and its costume designer being previously employed on 2019: After The Fall Of New York, Hercules stands as a monument to Italian-American cinema cooperation and proves the old adage that what the Cannon Group and Italian trash directors can do horribly on their own, they can do even worse together! Read More

Obligatory full disclosure: there isn’t anyone in this movie named Goliath. In fact, you’ve got Gordon Scott (Hercules Vs. The Moloch, Samson And The 7 Miracles Of The World) cinching up the leather girdle as some dude named Maciste. Not to worry though because Maciste is pretty much the same in the muscle-movie biz as Hercules, having nearly as many crazy adventures under nearly as many aliases as the daring demi-god himself! Read More

Walter Brennan, who won three Oscars in five years, stars as the lumber king who goes to the forest with his grandkids and runs into a couple of gnomes. Disney gets their money’s worth out of Wally as he also portrays the crotchety old gnome named Knobby. Three Oscars and none of them were for this film? Shoot, he should have won two for this movie alone! Read More

I’ve had some ups and downs in my life that left me questioning whether it’s possible to achieve true happiness or find an everlasting love (or at least a rather lengthy like). Where do I turn to find the answers to these affairs of the heart? My family? Messed up worse than me. My priest? I’m looking for advice, not to get hit on. My dog? I already know how to lick myself. No, as any guy who’s ever done time in the Heartbreak Hotel can tell you, the sagest of all advice comes from the gruff, but lovable ghost of a sea captain! Read More