Don The Dragon Wilson, Esq. It’s the sort of phrase that conjures up a variety of dream-like images. There’s the one where Don The Dragon is doing research using Westlaw and gets so excited to find a case on point that he karate chops his secretary through the office water cooler. You could also be excused if you imagine The Dragon objecting to some bit of damning testimony so vociferously that he actually splits the counsel table in half while pounding on it for emphasis! And then there’s all those billable hours for “kicking the shit out of hostile witness” and “ex parte beat down of trial judge.” Read More

Did it really take until 1999 to make a movie where a rapper hijacked a combination flamethrower/rocket launcher from low budget action icon Frank Zagarino? Did it really take cinema 100 years or so before it was mature enough to handle a film with Zags, Gary Busey, Jeff Fahey, Pam Grier, and prolific British kickstud Gary Daniels? Some of you are surely questioning the wisdom of letting Master P direct such a classic conflagration of paycheck hungry workhorses. I would question the wisdom of NOT letting him do it! Read More

Exceeding expectations. That’s where success lies in life. I think it was Rudy Guiliani who said to under promise and over deliver. I know this is true because it applies to sports and a concept that you can successfully apply to sports is one in which I have blind faith. Every week before a big football game, I have to hear the coach of my favorite team talk about how awesome his football team’s next opponent is. The guys they’re going up against are a combination Babe Ruth, Red Grange, Teddy Roosevelt, Dracula, and Zeus. Read More

Like Don “The Dragon” Wilson, Gary Daniels (Pocket Ninjas, Firepower) is a former kickboxing champion who has parlayed his titles into a film career starring in action movies no normal person has ever heard of. Like Olivier Gruner (another ex-kickboxing champ featured in a series of movies invisible to the mainstream), Gary possesses that bland, inoffensive charm that convinces you he’s a decent sort of guy who kicks ass only because he’s forced to. I mean, Gary only destroys an entire softball team after they say that he and buddy Sugar Ray Leonard are gay for each other! So parents can feel good about the positive message this film teaches about tolerance: don’t call tough guys queers! Because they won’t tolerate it! Read More

The Cyber-Tracker (or “CyberTracker” depending on the movie) franchise is brought to an explosive conclusion in this sequel which is positively cybertastic! Three long years after the events in the first CyberTracker film, Eric, Connie, and Jared return to do battle once again with evil cyborgs who are charged with enforcing the law, but have this disconcerting habit of being used to kill innocent people and assassinate politicians. The stakes are even higher though this time around because the Cyber-Trackers come in all sorts of awesome flavors! Read More

It’s time for another one of those bargain basement action icon team ups that can occasionally nudge a movie like Cyber Tracker from cyber crapper status all the way up to cyber clunker status! Much like the Jeff Speakman flick Scorpio One which had the Perfect Weapon take on Brent “Huffbo” Huff of Strike Commando 2 fame, Cyber Tracker creams the undiscerning action audience’s jeans with the mouth watering showdown between Don “The Dragon” Wilson and Richard “The Kick Fighter With A Mullet” Norton. If it doesn’t stack up to the fight on the space station between Speakman and Huff where Speakman smacked Huff in the head with a fire extinguisher, that just goes to show that when you have such legends brawling, the edge often comes down the intangibles. Intangibles like space stations and fire extinguishers. Read More